Couples Therapy in Tribeca, NYC
Are you and your significant other experiencing challenges?
Being in a relationship can be challenging for many people. Problems may arise at any time.
Some of your issues might have been brewing for quite a while but you both swept them under the carpet, hoping they would go away. Other difficulties may have arisen due to unexpected changes in your lives.
Regardless of when the problem(s) first appeared, they can result in one or both of you feeling disconnected from each other. And when people feel disconnected from each other, they often shut down and tune out.
This is a common occurrence that can be addressed in couples therapy to prevent the disconnection from worsening.
It's important to remember that while two different couples may share a similar problem, each relationship has its own distinctive dynamics and requires individualized strategies. Pursuing couples counseling is an important first step.
Reach Out With Any Questions on Couples Therapy:
Relationships Can Often Hit Some Snags
If you've been experiencing some problems in your relationship the reasons can be quite varied. While each couple's issues are unique to them, they often, though not always, fall under the following categories.
Infidelity
Your partner may have cheated and you're finding it difficult to trust him/her again. If your partner shared details of the encounters or you discovered them with the other person, you may find it hard to let go of the images.
There are times when the person who "stepped out" of the relationship did so with someone their partner knew, such as a close friend or family member, resulting in an additional layer of pain.
Changing Priorities
When two people decide to couple up, they're often on the same page about what their priorities are for the relationship. Sometimes those priorities change.
For example, you might have begun the relationship being the sole source of income, but now you want your partner to share some of the financial responsibilities. Your partner might have initially wanted (or not wanted) children but as time went on, changed their mind.
Where you want to retire (city, suburb, small time, overseas) might no longer be the choice of your significant other. Doing some couples counseling is a wonderful way to sort through these issues.
Disparities with Intimacy
One of you might no longer desire a sexual relationship, want increased or decreased intimacy, or even want to open the relationship to include other people. This is where intimacy counseling can be helpful.
Raising Children
Oftentimes, couples come into their relationships with different views on how to raise children. Partners who come from different cultures or religions, each with very specific ideas about raising kids, may find it challenging to find common ground.
For example, one of you might believe in strict rules while the other parent wants a more lenient approach. Some people can't agree on the number of children to have. You might have initially wanted only one child, but your partner is pushing for a second. A couples therapist can help guide you as you have these discussions.
The In-Laws
Issues may arise over the desired frequency of family of origin visits/involvement. Does your partner want to spend every weekend, holiday, or vacation with her family? How do you feel about the unannounced visits from the in-laws? Do his parents get to weigh in on how you're raising your kids?
These are just a few examples of reasons people seek out a couple's counselor. Your reasons will, of course, be unique to your relationship.
Couples Therapy Can Restore or Deepen your Connection
Couples can benefit from therapy in many ways and at different stages of their relationship. Helping a couple to better understand the relationship they’re in and how to bring out its strengths and deal with its weaknesses is a big part of the work I do.
The focus of your sessions will, of course, depend upon your specific goals but will often entail helping you improve your communication skills, developing effective strategies for resolving conflicts, and discovering ways to deepen your emotional bond.
So many of the problems couples experience can be greatly improved in couples counseling.
My Approach to Couples Therapy
Emotional intimacy is a cornerstone of relationships so understanding why a couple may be struggling with theirs is a large part of intimacy counseling.
Couples have different attachment histories as well as past traumas that could be interfering with them fostering a sense of closeness and understanding that is crucial to strengthening or repairing their bond.
Improved communication skills are something all couples can benefit from in couples counseling. When people can express themselves clearly and listen actively to their partners, misunderstandings and conflicts can more readily be avoided.
Of course, there may still be times when conflicts will arise. But when couples begin to understand their longstanding dysfunctional communication patterns through counseling, and acquire the tools necessary to change them, they will be in a much better position to manage disagreements and do repairs, if, and when needed.
Occasionally, even after working long and hard on a relationship, one or both partners may decide it’s time to move on. Helping people come to terms with the demise of their relationship is another part of couples therapy.
Who May Benefit from Working with Me
Long-Term Relationships
In long-term relationships, one or both people may feel their needs are not being heard and/or met. The passion of their early years might have waned, and they need to find ways to bring back romance and intimacy.
Others communicate in ways that discourage discourse. Hidden and unrealistic expectations might now be surfacing and causing friction. These are just some of the long-term relationship issues that can be resolved through couples counseling.
Premarital Relationships
Premarital counseling is useful to sort out any unresolved issues before finalizing the commitment. Too many people commit to each other before they’ve fully thought through their compatibility and goals for the relationship. These are best discussed before the big day in couples therapy.
Individuals in Relationships
Sometimes, one partner may need additional support or want to address personal challenges that may be affecting the relationship. This is where individual sessions may prove helpful.
There are also times when people who are having challenges in their relationship are not looking for couples therapy but rather, need some guidance in deciding whether to keep trying, or to move on.
Individual sessions are also beneficial for those having difficulties with other types of relationships such as friendships, co-workers/bosses, family members, etc.
Whether to Pursue Couples Counseling in New York
Even after reading this page, you might still be undecided about whether to proceed. That is totally normal. Questions may linger, such as the following:
Does seeing a couples counselor signify the end of our relationship?
What I will tell you is that unless one partner has already decided to end the coupledom, there are many ways and opportunities to fix issues and strengthen the relationship.
Therefore, when you make the decision to pursue counseling for couples, you're signaling your commitment to making life better for the both of you. And that is a good thing!
What happens if the therapist seems to be siding with one partner?
If you believe that is happening, it's important to speak up. But in most cases, we therapists are trained to be impartial.
That's not to say that a couples therapist won't call out one of the partners when he/she is acting disrespectfully or causing physical or psychological harm to their partner. Therapy must be a safe space for everyone.
What if I don't want to disclose something personal to my partner?
At the beginning of therapy, one or two individual sessions are advisable so the therapist is aware of the issue(s) and can discuss with you the pros/cons of withholding information from your partner.
Are you Ready to Rediscover the Joys of your Relationship?
If you're interested in learning more about couples counseling, I'd be happy to schedule a 15-minute free phone consultation with you.
Recent Posts
